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Writer's pictureSindara Oyekola

Musings about Failure

It is often said that comparison is the thief of joy but I think perfectionism is high up there as well because it cripples you and, if not managed, can stop you living a fulfilling life.

Lady in afro
Photo by Matheus Natan

When I was little, I didn’t do anything I wasn’t perfect at. I stopped dancing when I was pretty young because why, I would ask, wasn’t I winning all the prizes for playing musical chairs and dancing competitions? I didn’t play any sports in secondary school for the same reason and the one time I was put in a race, I didn’t even try to run fast because “what’s the point in trying if after all my efforts I still come in last?”


The thing about life though is that whether or not you stay firmly in your comfort zone, you will encounter failure. For me, that first experience was graduating from college and spending three months looking for a job with the prospect of losing my immigration status looming. There’s only so many times that you can get the “Thank you for applying but we will not be moving forward with your application” email or no response to an application at all before you either sink into a hole of despair, or reframe your mindset and develop thick skin, or both. I definitely went through both.


Since that experience, I’m proud to say I’ve experienced many more failures because what that really means is that I’ve tried many more things. I’m even getting back into dancing. Granted, my flexibility is terrible and I’m not sure I can dance to a beat but I don’t have to be perfect, I just have to have fun and try. I challenge you to give yourself the freedom to do the same!

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1 則留言


訪客
2022年9月26日

I love this, Sindara!!

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